i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Text me some of your sweat
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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