he wants to bone in the snuggie
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
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