a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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