i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
