Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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