So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
My feet surprised me
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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