4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
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