All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize