Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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