i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
did i just pee glitter
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize