it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
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