Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize