everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
