they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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