am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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