Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
