So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
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You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize