They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
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slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
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I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight