And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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