i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
My feet surprised me
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize