it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
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her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
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Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.