Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
