He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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