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• (917): View more from New York City

  yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.

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• (774): View more from Massachusetts

  i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.

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• (818): View more from California

  Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.

  (1-818): View more from California

  Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.

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• (801): View more from Utah

  please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.

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  These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch

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• (727): View more from Florida

  I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday

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• (936): View more from Texas

  You can't call dibs 8 years later.

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• (229): View more from Georgia

  Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (646): View more from New York

  Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too

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• (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.

  (407): View more from Florida

  Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?

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• (415): View more from California

  So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap

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