Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old