Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
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