pedialite and red bull = repair kit
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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