Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Enjoy the penises
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
