we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
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