Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
You're like the curious george of whores
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize
