Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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