dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
this is an emotional support booty call
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize