She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize