can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
