Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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