I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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