the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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