Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
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I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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