Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
