There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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