so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
