she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I believe in your delicious
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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