i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
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Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
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I will be naked everywhere
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.