absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
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wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
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Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I currently don't understand fingers.
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