Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
