okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize