ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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