is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
