Need sex. Gaining weight.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Your cock deserves a montage
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
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