Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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