went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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